Wichita Counseling and Coaching Center

Call (316) 729-9965                


Parenting Rules for Permissive Parents: Use These with Caution
 by: Jean Tracy. MSS

I remember a childless couple who slept with their dogs. They were clearly uncomfortable with the situation. Yet every night their dogs crawled into bed with them.

During the day the two black labs ran through the house, climbed on the furniture, and regularly ate human food from the hands of their masters. Did you know some parents treat their kids like this couple treated their dogs? Let’s find out how.

Recently, my own Yellow Lab, Chum, had knee surgery. While sitting in the waiting room, I noticed this sign on the doctor’s wall.

Dog Rules:

The dog is Not allowed in the house.

Okay, the dog is allowed in the house, but Only in certain rooms.

Alright, the dog is allowed in all rooms, but has to Stay Off the furniture.

Well, okay, the dog can get on the old furniture Only.

Fine, the dog is allowed on all the furniture, but is Not Allowed to sleep on the bed.

Okay, the dog is allowed on the bed, but Only by invitation.

The dog can sleep on the bed anytime, but Not Under the covers.

Okay, the dog can sleep under the covers every night.

Humans Must Ask permission to sleep under the covers with the dogs.

So what’s the problem? Could it be that the Dog Rules, really meant that The Dogs Ruled? How does this apply to parents?

The inconsistent or permissive parent treats their kids a lot like these dogs. When parents state what they expect and then give in to the demands of their kids, parents trample their own authority and let their kids rule.

If this is happening in your house, you need to change and you can change! Why do you need to change?

Because being consistent gives your child:

A sense of being loved

A feeling of security

Respect for you


A likable personality

How can you change? First, you must decide to change. Second, follow the 5 rules listed below.

5 Consistent Rules:

1. Think wisely before you speak.
2. If you say “No,” mean it.
3. Use a firm voice.
4. Use few words.
5. No arguing.

The Wrap-Up:

The couple with the black labs changed their own behavior.

The dogs went to the dog house.

The couple enjoyed sleeping in their bed alone.

Being consistent is one of the best ways to show love.

If you’re inconsistent, you can change.

By following the 5 Consistent Rules listed above, you'll be kind and firm, show love, and be a character builder too. Here's to your consistent success!

About The Author

Jean Tracy, MSS, Edmonds, WA, USA

Learn more about Free Parenting Newsletter

Learn powerful parenting concepts that you can use right now! Informative articles written by seasoned therapists with tips and tools you must use to raise your awesome kids with solid characters.

Sign up for her FREE Parenting Newsletter and download 80 FREE Bonding Activities when you subscribe at: http://www.kidsdiscuss.com